this is suppose to be published in CFSMKDJ newsletter but i'm kinda let u all read first la.. Oh yes oh yes, now! Don’t think that this is a math quiz or what. Look at the numbers hanging up there, what strikes into your mind? Three digits and a flying dot by the side? Or rather you will say, ‘ separuh bulat la! ‘, and yea, that proves that you need math tuition, muahaha! Well, let me be straight, it is a U turn and of course, you are suppose to feel lost now and wondering what on earth am I talking about. Ok guys and gurls! It is simulation time! Listen this, our lives are just like ‘life-cars’ in the highway, some of us have a driver but some we don’t. Still feeling obscure? Good then! Continue reading on!
It is all about memories and how wonderfully my life has changed upside down. This story of mine is just never ending and remarkable because I’m talking about my true self now, about my past experience, about how I climb ahead of all the troubles, and about how I trusted God. Before I start my story telling time, I shall code to you a verse, Psalms 55:22 “ Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you.” And don't see any verses as a line of word, but it can be a meaning of life for eternity like mine today only if you mean it by your heart.
Well, I have so much to share about my life changing experience but allow me to flashback to five years ago, the moment where I was still innocent yet cute! :p.. That time I was still an atheist even though I attended Sunday school as usual but due to my ignorant brainy, I was still not mutual enough to give a care about anything I heard or learned and the only thing I learned is about Noah’s ark... wondering why? Because there was where I knew about animals... wahaha! X) And yea, when it came to the time for me to enter into SMKDJ, my secondary school, I still blaspheme about God in disrespectful way, things like ‘go die la!’, ‘oh my God!’ and sort of... but I never knew the meaning behind it and had fun saying it as loud as possible. But remember, I was still form one then and had this fuzzy and nerdy look! Well, as soon as I entered into this school, some sort of feeling just got my attention to join CF and I was doubt about it. But until Wei Chin (our ex ex president) came to my classroom and began to promote about joining CF, that is where I set my decision and went for it.
My life at that time was just like a superb Ferrari which is well polished and everything was just great. But sooner, my engine began to have defects and black smokes can be seen all around. Now what I mean here is that temptation, frustrations, worries, jealousy, and all others anti Christian behavior began to overwhelm my life. I had splendid of annoying problems and was in always in a quandary to take the next step. I was still a blurry youth that time, letting the bygone be bygone. But every time when I faced up with a dilemma, I had no courage to take on any risk. I had no purpose of living. It is just like a car without driver, in the middle of the highway and heading nowhere and ignoring the signboards.
That journey without meaning of living lasted for about two years. Many things came so unpredictable and my life was easily influenced. I didn’t have a pillar of strength or hope to grab on. At the end of the period, my ‘car’ was defiled by so many things, also meaning, my personalities were vulnerable to all the temptations out there. I even got so jealous of everything and began to envy about stationeries and so that was when the first big sin I committed. Believe it or not? I was so good at stealing and got unspotted for almost 7 trips of stealing. And the worst thing I had ever done is also selling all those stationeries to my friends, at super cheap rate! cheaper than any place you can find! Let’s say.. er.. G-tec for RM2? But well of course, the bad one will be punished and the good one will be rewarded! My mom eventually found out of my evil doings, just because I didn’t manage to cover up for my secretive doings. And guess what? I broke into tears and for the first time, I felt the regret of committing sin and as if a heavy stone was chained to my legs. My mom was ashamed to talk me and embarrassed of my doings, but then she didn’t just walk away in sorrow ; instead, she stated to me this wonderful verse, 2 chronicles 7:14 ‘ if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and will heal their land.’
That was the exact moment I began to question myself, ‘God, are you there right up in the heaven? Watching what I have done? ‘ Fear starting to rain down on me when this question myself this over ten times and from that onwards, I was so hunger to know more about his presence and his kingdom. It was my third year in secondary school then, and of course, I went to CF camp again! Woohoo! And that was one of the thriving moments of my spiritual life again! A second generation of Christian was borne! It was a night of confessions of sins to our only one God and Savior.
All before this my ‘car’ was all along heading into a popular road which is filled with fames, bad habits, wickedness; but it was God who gave me a U turn! Yea! A U turn to an eternity life that is filled with hope! Joy! And freedom that you will never ever get from anywhere. And there are so many things to mention but you got to experience it for yourself! He, the Holy God, has set an escape road for me! Has sent His angels to guide me in my every thoughts, movement, and words. Meantime, He polished my car and even repairs every single damage of it. My sins were forgiven! I have found my purpose! I have armored myself with the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteous, the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation and the sword of the spirit! (Ephesians 6) and the most important thing, I have found the purpose of life, the purpose that gives me the hope to continue my spiritual life.
And of course, it was not camp alone that gave me this chance to know more about Him, but this camp gave me chance to have even more chance! Why? Somehow, after this camp, I even want to know even even more! Yea! And from this onwards I began to join XYZ, Xtraordinary Youth Zone, and this is just simply awesome! I began to learn marvelous things about being Christ like and began to serve Him more from there. I thank God for placing me in such a beautiful place somehow, it is where I got to fellowship and got help from! I just got so excited of joining into such an amazing place.
Well, look guys, that is how God has changed my life! And of course, I wasn’t telling 100% due to limited space to write this life journal of mine. But tell you what now! My life is still filled with temptations now! Everyone has them because Satan is trying to control us by giving us sins! But sin only comes when you lust for the temptation! And it is in Christ, our pillar of strength, we got to control our lust and sins are from away from us then! I have so many problems right now too, such as family problem, financial problem and the list just go never ending but the thing is I am not worry about it, For God will provide to me anything that is according to His will! (Luke 1: 50-54). And I am not only hungry to know more about Him, but I am also hungry to know more and more people, and tell the world that He is alive! That He is the forgiver of sins! That He is the Hope and the light!
Well people, tell you what.. It is still the road less taken leads us to sweet surrender. You will only experience how great it is only if you have gone through it, and the truth is the experience will last forever, because He is carrying us all along.
Credits to the newsletter department who gave me this wonderful opportunity to share my memories and my experience. If you have any questions to ask me regarding about my spiritual walk or just a chit chat, please add me at
special_starz_371@hotmail.com. ‘let us return to the LORD, for he has torn, and he will heal us.’ Hosea said it… anyways.. Take care people! Let us shake the planet yea! Let us be a glowing light in the dark! Let us worship Him, the creator of universe, forever and till the eternity!
Agape,
Your humble servant of Christ,
Gene-Harn,
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